The Right Stroke!
By Nevin Jefferson
Oh joy, girls and studs! Another first in Gayville, a gay couple is expecting a bundle of four in August. Yes, a ready-made family consisting of three boys and one girl for a hair stylist and his lover who own a salon. No doubt about it, somebody is definitely have to be a stay at home Mom. The surrogate mother is a client of the salon and is said to be doing fine with four loaves in the oven. The couple hails from Lexington, Kentucky the State that asks the question; “If a couple gets divorced are they still brother and sister?” The breeder genes were intact as the cup runneth over for the in-vitro fertilization process with a result of quadruplets. According to the
couple, raising children is important and they’re going to raise their kids to be good people. One gets to play “Father Knows Best” with the other playing “Donna Reed”. Can’t you just die?! A sonogram hangs on the wall of the salon for all to see and share in their joy. Now of course, we live in a world where your house is either bombed or burned while you’re in it by mindless twits with hearts of hate. There are those who say that the happy couple should stay private while others say; “Go for it!” and go for the perks like John Q. Breeder would in this situation. Quadruplets are uncommon with 18 sets being born in Kentucky since 1975 with the latest addition being more uncommon and a triumph for gay couples all over. My sexy female
friend, who has gone from slinging and posing around my home to putting together my lawn mower and showing me how to mow a lawn, thinks that this incident is going to be ignored by the media just like the birth of quadruplets to a Black couple would be. What a world, huh? I would love to see this couple get the free diapers, baby food, toys, cash, and everything else that is deserving of the happy family. Why shouldn’t they take all of the endorsements that they can get and then some? Wouldn’t it be nice to have Gerber Babies that are from our very own? Why can’t these be Fisher-Price Kids? Martha Steward is gay-friendly wouldn’t it be nice if she did a kids line for this happy family to be? That and child proof the house on her
show. The possibilities are endless. Why shouldn’t they be on the Morning Shows aplenty? They should also do the talk show circuit with an audience of their peers without the so-called opposing sides that producers insist on. They should do interviews and photo shoots for all of the Family magazines including the cover. Family is the latest craze with most people opting to have one, so why not? This is a family! This is the real world that we live in where gays are capable of raising children and have been for years. Our joy shouldn’t be wrecked by fear nor should our sense of peace be shattered by the stupidity on parade from the unmoral majority. Anyone in his or her right mind knows that you never piss off a hairdresser, look at Anita Bryant. To this day she still can’t get her hair and makeup done. Or more recently the Super Model who mouthed off about Ru Paul using her name in his
hit song “Super Model”. At her next big show no hair dresser or makeup artist would go near her forcing her to do her own. When she hit the runway, she looked like a street chick with big knockers with nobody recognizing her. She immediately apologized and retracted her statement to save face, for real! With this in mind, the happy couple can milk the cow dry without a worry. Then there’s the old adage, never screw around with gays, they will get you in the long run and it’s going to be real cute! It makes quite the gossip and a good story to make the rounds through the community. And have I got news for my fellow lesbians who want to add a little dividend to their relationship. Over in jolly olde London, a web site was introduced for lesbian couples wanting to have children. In the first 48 hour of Internet life, the
site was hit with 8,000 applicants interested and ready to spoon over $730.00 for the service. Get ready Butch, the name is going to just thrill you silly! ManNotIncluded.com provides sperm donors for “home insemination” without meeting the donor. No jerking around here! The company does have a screening process that personally vets both parties. The sperm donations are going to be made through establishments known in this field. Medical screening will also be performed that will help prevent women from being at any risk. Isn’t modern science wonderful? The Founder is thrilled by the demand which proves the need for this service and product. There isn’t a shortage of supply either with 5,000 men signing up to be donors for $75.00-$90.00 a shot. 5,000 men getting off in Dixie, the South
has risen again! Talk about your British Invasions, gang! If you rather adopt, you can. Two Leather Daddies have adopted me in my lifetime, so I’m recommending it whole-heartedly. I’m too old for a Daddy, so I’m looking into adopting a leather stud. True, there’s a lot of paper work and legal hoops to jump through but it’s all worth it in the end. There’s also Foster Kids who desperately need loving homes along with throwaway teens. So if you have parental instincts that’s winding your body clock, you can now set the alarm.
© Nevin Jefferson, All Rights Reserved